Mommy!!! I crying!!!

Yes, those are the words Sarah yelled for about 35 minutes last night - starting at 9:45.

Sarah has never been a good sleeper, except when she was a very small baby and still sleeping in her carseat every night. Now she is an awful sleeper. Somewhere along the way, probably when she had a cold, I took her to the recliner so I could rest. Now that happens a lot. Probably 3.5 nights out of 7. Yup. It is awful.

I love the moments of snuggling with Sarah. I really do. When she just falls back on me and falls right asleep, I love every second of it. But then there are night when she wiggles and rolls around on me and never settles. Those moments suck. But, either way, I am losing sleep and it takes a toll on me. Physically and mentally.

Along the way, Sarah has had things that make her a bad sleeper. She has digestive problems and that can really make her gassy at night. And every tooth that has come in meant at least a week or two of bad sleep. And then there are the colds that cause her not to be able to breathe and the episodes of croup. Ugh!

Have I mentioned that I never had any of this with Justin? Not once did I have to sleep with Justin. Once he did sleep with us though. The next day we brought him to the doctor and sure enough it was an ear infection. But other than that, we never had any of this.

But Sarah....

So anyway, no she has had a cold again and got croupy again. Last night when she started crying I thought I was going to lose my mind. I didn't hear the croupy cry, so I just quickly got ready for bed in case. Then I went to bed and watched her on the monitor and listened in case she got croupy. No croup. But lots and lots of "Mommy! I crying!!!!" This girl knows what she's doing, huh? She is killing me. I love her to death. But, omg. That is so cruel to do to a momma. But, I didn't give in. I let her CIO. Now, in the past, when Sarah CIO, she has cried for over 3 hours. And the CIO thing is so tricky b/c it can often wake up Justin, which just sucks when it's 3 am and 2 of them are crying. So, back to last night....she cried and cried but finally stopped after 35 minutes or so. I was shocked. And I watched and waited. She was awake. She rubbed her lovey and moved around a little. But only gave out a few more whimpers. Amazing. And then I never heard from her again.

So, I know I need to do this. I know I need to let her learn to sleep without me. But I know it will be hard.

On the nights she wakes Justin, I probably have no choice but to hold her.
On the nights she's sick, I will have to hold her.

But oh how I hope we can get her to be a normal sleeper.

Wish me luck!

Oh, and Sarah, Yes, I know you are crying!